As many of you know, dear readers, my wife and I just bought a house about thirty minutes from our old place, on the outskirts of San Antonio, back in September.
Love the house. Hate the fucking drivers around here. Especially three different types:
The dudes that drive these huge, shiny pickup trucks, and in particular the Toyota Tundra dudes. It’s like they desperately want everyone to know how small their dick is. I’ve had two of them tailgate me, one at night with his fucking brights on. Tailgaters suck in general, but that’s just plain messed up.
BMW drivers. All BMW drivers. Four years ago, I had to take my wife downtown to work, and I got cut off twice and flipped off by one of them.
People who speed excessively. Now, I generally go with the flow of traffic, which around here is about 5-10 MPH over the limit. Going through our development, there is posted limit of 30 MPH, and there’s also a school zone. I’ve seen people doing 40 through the school zone (with the lights flashing, mind you), and 50 down the rest of the road. It’s about a mile and a half from our house to the entrance of the development. I’ve seen two kids bikes decorated with flowers. This development has only been here for six years, I believe.
Listen up, peens. According to EPA's (Environmental Protection Agency) data, the average weight of an automobile in 2022 was around 4,094 pounds, which is only a slight increase compared to 2018's 4,000 pounds.
You are the guidance system for a two-ton kinetic kill vehicle. Fucking act like it.